Fishers of Men
I think Christians often go into their devotions or Bible studies with the mindset of, "I'm going to have an 'AHA moment' and really change my outlook on my life." I really struggled with this for a while, then I started to think about what I was actually doing. I realized, I wouldn't go into a conversation with a close friend of mine thinking, "I hope I get something out of this." Why should I treat my closest, most intimate friend that way? In fact, while spending time with Christ we should have the mindset of, "what can I give?" We can give our time, our worship, our burdens, our love and our devotion. Having said that, I frequently have a devotional that goes right along with how I am feeling, and issues I am dealing with. Just like a close friend (because that's what He is) Jesus recognizes our weaknesses and struggles and longs to comfort and help us.
Tonight was one of those "AHA moments" for me. I have been struggling recently with my "calling" in life. I feel like there is a lot of pressure to find my calling and to pursue it until I'm blue in the face. I feel like everyone I know has some sort of passion that has completely and utterly enveloped their lives. I have always felt a passion about children, I mean how could I not after living with my mother for so long? I have read books like Kisses From Katie and have been so inspired by these young people that follow Christ's calling on their lives with reckless abandon. I want that. I want to feel that about something.
I have always had a heart for children in abusive or tough situations. I have been so blessed by my "position" in life that I want to be able to take the abundance of love I have received throughout my life, and pour it into someone's life that doesn't know what love is. Every time I have these thoughts, I immediately start to go through my mind about all of the negatives. What if I have to move far away? What if I lose things that are dear to me? And my personal favorite What if I have to give up all of my comforts? Didn't I just say that I wanted to help children in bad situations? Yet I'm unwilling to give up my very own comfort.
I wrote in my journal tonight about that very thing. Telling God that I want to follow Him... but I'm scared. My devotional passage today was in Mark 1. It was talking about when Jesus saw the fishermen and told them to follow Him. They put down their nets, walked away following Jesus and didn't look back. What? They didn't bat an eyelash, they didn't ask why, they simply followed. That was a big wake up call for me tonight. I am still fearful of what lies ahead, but I am also excited to see what the Lord has in store for me. All I have to do is choose whether or not I adhere to His command... and follow Him.
Tonight was one of those "AHA moments" for me. I have been struggling recently with my "calling" in life. I feel like there is a lot of pressure to find my calling and to pursue it until I'm blue in the face. I feel like everyone I know has some sort of passion that has completely and utterly enveloped their lives. I have always felt a passion about children, I mean how could I not after living with my mother for so long? I have read books like Kisses From Katie and have been so inspired by these young people that follow Christ's calling on their lives with reckless abandon. I want that. I want to feel that about something.
I have always had a heart for children in abusive or tough situations. I have been so blessed by my "position" in life that I want to be able to take the abundance of love I have received throughout my life, and pour it into someone's life that doesn't know what love is. Every time I have these thoughts, I immediately start to go through my mind about all of the negatives. What if I have to move far away? What if I lose things that are dear to me? And my personal favorite What if I have to give up all of my comforts? Didn't I just say that I wanted to help children in bad situations? Yet I'm unwilling to give up my very own comfort.
I wrote in my journal tonight about that very thing. Telling God that I want to follow Him... but I'm scared. My devotional passage today was in Mark 1. It was talking about when Jesus saw the fishermen and told them to follow Him. They put down their nets, walked away following Jesus and didn't look back. What? They didn't bat an eyelash, they didn't ask why, they simply followed. That was a big wake up call for me tonight. I am still fearful of what lies ahead, but I am also excited to see what the Lord has in store for me. All I have to do is choose whether or not I adhere to His command... and follow Him.
Comments
Post a Comment